I always try to be as specific as I can when I post an audition notice, because, well, I know what I need, and what I need you to be able to do, and whether you pay attention to what I said, because it means you take direction, a skill nobody in the troupe retains once they’ve been a member six months. By then I love them, so it doesn’t matter anymore. Here are examples of people who didn’t get cast. All from real life. Honestly.

1. The 5’4″, 40 something guy with bad teeth you thought he was a ‘young leading man’ type.

2. The actual young leading man type who thought the balcony scene from Romeo and Juliet was a comic monologue.

3. The guy who auditioned with ‘Happy Birthday.’

Ok, this post is already way too long, so I will explain the query part tomorrow. I’m sure you’ll be waiting with baited breath, or at least, breath.